I search for non toxic masculinity as well. Although, for me, it’s more toxic people vs non toxic people. Gender is irrelevant. I search for Humanity.
I call myself a gay transgender man. I have a uterus. I have born four children. I do not feel like a woman. I don’t know what those terms mean. Woman and man. We are all humans. Some with uteruses. Some with testes. The range of possibilities is endless because humans are as varied as stars.
Thanks for sharing this. I think what comes up for me is that so many of us are just walking around with the baggage of our pasts in a context of a sick and dysfunctional society. Including your date, including you, including me and my husband. Cis, trans, and everything in between. I know that's super general, but that's what this sparked.
Naming the invisible backpack turns shame into something you can set down. Masculinity rooted in consent, presence, and tenderness is not a threat. It is an offering. 🌱
Healthy masculinity...is hard to name for me. But I know what it feels like. It's grounded and present, flexible but firm, and it makes me feel safe. Toxic masculinity, on the other hand, feels rigid and authoritarian. Like walking on eggshells even if you're carrying heavy bags. I feel healthy in a masculine way when I can cry aloud and name my hurts, and find solidarity with other people who have been through similar pains. It's connective to me. Thanks for the great read, I needed this today :)
Hey Rey, sending you lots of love and healing. I am trans fem and this piece still resonates - like in some ways I have been looking for a way to forgive the masculine me. The person that hid in board meetings and video games while desiring very deeply to allow the feminine me to come out. Ideologically, I think the division between masculine and feminine is a false one. Sure, there are some natural characteristics for the different hormonal systems we run on - estrogen or testosterone. But, the over generalization of your masculinity being one thing or my femoninity being another is just a characture of the depth of our inner lives. For me the practice of this ideology feels impossible and even seemingly defeating the purpose of my own transition mtf. But, we live in a binary society so of course there is some intrinsic attraction to one binary (no matter how much I tried to be non-binary). Anyway, it is certainly true that it's a lifelong journey to become yourself. You don't know me and I don't know you but the more we share, the more we become friends 💖💖💖.
I search for non toxic masculinity as well. Although, for me, it’s more toxic people vs non toxic people. Gender is irrelevant. I search for Humanity.
I call myself a gay transgender man. I have a uterus. I have born four children. I do not feel like a woman. I don’t know what those terms mean. Woman and man. We are all humans. Some with uteruses. Some with testes. The range of possibilities is endless because humans are as varied as stars.
I love this comment. Quite literally we are all so HOMO 😜💖💅🎉😂
😝😂😂❤️
Thanks for sharing this. I think what comes up for me is that so many of us are just walking around with the baggage of our pasts in a context of a sick and dysfunctional society. Including your date, including you, including me and my husband. Cis, trans, and everything in between. I know that's super general, but that's what this sparked.
Naming the invisible backpack turns shame into something you can set down. Masculinity rooted in consent, presence, and tenderness is not a threat. It is an offering. 🌱
Healthy masculinity...is hard to name for me. But I know what it feels like. It's grounded and present, flexible but firm, and it makes me feel safe. Toxic masculinity, on the other hand, feels rigid and authoritarian. Like walking on eggshells even if you're carrying heavy bags. I feel healthy in a masculine way when I can cry aloud and name my hurts, and find solidarity with other people who have been through similar pains. It's connective to me. Thanks for the great read, I needed this today :)
Hey Rey, sending you lots of love and healing. I am trans fem and this piece still resonates - like in some ways I have been looking for a way to forgive the masculine me. The person that hid in board meetings and video games while desiring very deeply to allow the feminine me to come out. Ideologically, I think the division between masculine and feminine is a false one. Sure, there are some natural characteristics for the different hormonal systems we run on - estrogen or testosterone. But, the over generalization of your masculinity being one thing or my femoninity being another is just a characture of the depth of our inner lives. For me the practice of this ideology feels impossible and even seemingly defeating the purpose of my own transition mtf. But, we live in a binary society so of course there is some intrinsic attraction to one binary (no matter how much I tried to be non-binary). Anyway, it is certainly true that it's a lifelong journey to become yourself. You don't know me and I don't know you but the more we share, the more we become friends 💖💖💖.